Chalked Up: Inside Elite Gymnastics' Merciless Coaching, Overzealous Parents, Eating Disorders, and Elusive Olympic Dreams

[MaryClare]

She just comes across as very jealous. Her “flex” is that she’s so over gymnastics when in reality she is really isn’t. Only the most very talented gymnasts are able to even partially execute a comeback so many years later

 

[IratePanda]

Yes. She's probably also angry and bitter because she was never good to begin with.

I did feel a twinge of sympathy after her win at '86 Nationals. She couldn't fully enjoy her victory because she knew it would be downhill from there. But just a twinge. Glass half-empty people will never be happy, unless they're making other people miserable.

 

[JDB]

Jen Sey wrote blog posts for the now defunct Mommy Track'd in 2008. One blog post was about Chusovitina competing at the 2008 Olympics. She wrote about how unprecedented a 32 year-old competing in Olympic gymnastics was. Sports media at the time portrayed Olympic gymnastics as a sport for teenage girls. When Athlete A came out 12 years later, Sey had different views on why so many elite gymnasts were young.

She wrote another post that year about how difficult it would be for Shawn Johnson to compete at the 2012 Olympics. Again, it reflected the media's view of gymnastics at he time.

 

[RichardL]

Jen Sey wrote blog posts for the now defunct Mommy Track'd in 2008. One blog post was about Chusovitina competing at the 2008 Olympics. She wrote about how unprecedented a 32 year-old competing in Olympic gymnastics was. Sports media at the time portrayed Olympic gymnastics as a sport for teenage girls. When Athlete A came out 12 years later, Sey had different views on why so many elite gymnasts were young.

She wrote another post that year about how difficult it would be for Shawn Johnson to compete at the 2012 Olympics. Again, it reflected the media's view of gymnastics at he time.

I always forget about how legitimate Johnson's comeback attempt was. She was the Worlds alternate and won gold with the team at Pan Ams in 2011. The 2012 team was so stacked, but she and Liukin were really right there in theory. Sloan also made it to Trials but injured herself there. Peszek was the only one from the 2008 team to not compete elite again after 2009.

 

[QuietColours]

Chapter 26

• Resuming training
  • She'd assumed the meet would be a disaster and she'd be allowed to quit. Instead she had qualified for Pan Ams and Worlds. This seduced her into thinking that one more year of training might not be so bad. Parkettes had gotten her this fair. She was already miserable. What was another year?
  • Was berated for her weight of 102 at the Pan Ams training camp. At 18 and 5'4, Jen thought it was a reasonable weight, but the nutritionist disagreed. She questioned if there were weight struggles in Jen's family. When told no, she asked, "Then what's wrong with you?"
  • Her body fat test had come back at 3%, higher than some of the other girls, but not that high. She still had never had a period. The nutritionist suggested a diet high in vegetables and whole grains and about four times the calories Jen ate in a day
  • Jen left the training camp early of her own volition
  • Demonstrating independent thought marked Jen as "past her prime" (with coaches or the federation isn't specified). She was considering leaving Parkettes, but no other team wanted her
  • She spiraled. She could barely get out of bed, started skipping practices. When she figured her mother was sufficiently worried, she went home and would find her distraught mother locked in her room
• Ankle
  • Dr. Dixon finally diagnosed the foot after almost two years–multiple bone chips floating around that had taken years to calcify enough to show up on the x-ray. Some had become lodged in the joint, causing irritation and infection. Dr. Dixon said she could have them removed, but she'd be out the gym for a while. The coaches said no. She'd survived with them for this long; they could wait until she went to college
• Next steps
  • Jen refused to go the Worlds Championships. The Strausses were relieved, though they wouldn't admit it. She would have embarrassed them if she went to the training camp.
  • Jen had finally found a solution that would appease her mother–she'd go back to Lolo, the only club that would have her. She knew she needed to get away from her mother, Parkettes, and John (who still believed she'd recover from all this).
  • Her parents argued about it. Her father had come around to letting her disappear from gymnastics and go to college, putting the whole affair behind them. Her mother fought him bitterly, but eventually agreed to let Jen go back to Will-Moor
  • The Parkettes coaches were furious. Robin confronted her. Jen, having graduated high school, had a day job doing retail stocking. Robin caught her in the parking lot. She begged her to just quit, not switch gyms. "Don't you know how this looks for us? A former national champion, going to another gym?"
  • Jen wanted to scream that it was her choice, not Parkettes'. And that she wanted to quit but her mother wouldn't let her. It made her decide to give it an honest try at Lolo's out of spite
  • Jen went back to NJ alone–her family stayed in Allentown. Her father commuted to Philadelphia every day and her brother stayed at Gymnastrum–he was a junior and wanted to graduate with his friends. All the girls who lived with them had moved on
    • Jen went to UCLA, Kristy went to Berkley
    • Alyssa had gone home to NJ for a year before starting college–she and Jen would be going to Stanford in the same year
  • Her mom was left with her brother and the occasional temporary border. Everyone was resentful and probably glad to be rid of each other. Jen moved in with her Aunt Jill, who had always been present and supportive, and slacked
  • She knew she'd chosen to go back to Lolo to find love and understanding and rehabilitate herself. It was a safe haven where she could ease into retirement
• Lolo's
  • Lolo welcomed Jen back and let her participate on her own terms. She didn't get upset if Jen skipped practice, if all she did was stretch and talk. She gave Jen classes to teach; her son Sam was now a weight lifter and taught her how to lift. She built bulky muscle. There were lots of hugs. Lolo reminded her she was the 1986 national champion and that her whole life was in front of her
  • Her depression took a year to diminish in intensity. Laxative use got worse now that she had a car and no one hovering over her shoulder. Often thought of crashing her car. She no longer spoke with her parents at all. Their disappointment in her was unabated; her disappointment in them intensified. If she thought about her mother she couldn't breath
  • Her father wrote her a letter asking her to come home before college, to take pity on her mother–her mother was out of line, but for the right reasons, she had wanted to protect Jen from disappointment later in life. The letter was computer printed (his word processor was his new toy). She was furious–the fact he didn't hand write it in those days felt impersonal. And she was intent to not go home, to make them work to repair the damage. She sent back a handwritten note: You're more enamored with experimenting with your new computer than you are in me. Where's the apology? Where's Mom's letter?
  • She did one competition with Lolo. It was terrible–she fell at least once on every event, tripping and clumsy. She sobbed afterwards
  • One day she stopped crying–the truth was there, she was done. There would be no 1988 Olympics. She'd bide her time and go to college
• Stanford
  • Arrived on crutches, finally having had the bone chips removed
  • Most of the other athletes (in other sports) there anticipated careers beyond college; some would achieve it
  • She was completely exhausted–she viewed college as a retirement home. She didn't think there was a life for her beyond those four years.
  • She ate a lot–gained 40 pounds her freshman year. She started menstruating. Alyssa, her former Parkettes teammate, had to show 20 year old Jen how to use a tampon. Jen wasn't sure what all the body parts she was describing were
  • Four years of eating, drinking, and forgetting she finally started to realize she was barely 23 and would have a career and a life beyond gymnastics
• Today
  • At 38, her ankles hurt. The balls of her feet ache every time she walks. Her knees grind and creak. She has regular sciatic nerve pain. Her hands are arthritic and a disorder called trigger finger means that it takes an hour for the fluid to drain from her hands in the morning.
  • She always misses the feeling of flying. Sometimes if she runs far enough she can get the same numb leg feeling. The next day her shins, ankles, and hips always hurt
  • Still has a love affair with gymnastics and that period in her life–she misses it every day